What Would Dagny Do? Ayn Rand on the PPP

In dystopic Atlas Shrugged, Dagny Taggart faced huge obstacles keeping the railroad running. But the president of the nation, Mr. Thompson, authorized the Payroll Protection Plan. Would Dagny fill out the application paperwork herself, or would she delegate that to Eddie Willers?

 

Howard Roark said No to the Manhattan Bank Building commission, even though he had no savings and no prospects of commissions. To alter the building’s façade—he could not do that for money.

To the incredulous chairman he said, “That was the most selfish thing you’ve ever seen a man do.” Roark knew the exterior of a building had to match its core purpose, just as a man’s words and actions had to match his core values.

The next day, his friend Mike offered him a job at the granite quarry in Connecticut.

“That’s okay, Mike,” Howard said easily. “My check from the Payroll Protection Plan should keep my office going for a while.”

 

Hank Rearden was proud of Rearden Metal—both for his technical achievement and what its business success symbolized. So when a government functionary offered him a blank check for Rearden Metal, he refused to sign for it. Contemptuously, he dismissed the man from his office.

Later, he sat as his desk late at night, alone, the Payroll Protection Plan paperwork before him, waiting for his signature. This is different, Rearden said silently to himself, as he signed with a flourish.  

 

Next: Francisco D’Anconia?

 

[File under: Integrity, Dark Humor.]

[Update: My follow-up Open College podcast on the morality of accepting taxpayer/government support.]

4 thoughts on “What Would Dagny Do? Ayn Rand on the PPP”

  1. Rearden had a change of heart because this time was different? I suppose it is different. By signing and thereby taking the funds he lessons the dilution of wealth that was approved by others. In hand to hand combat if one picks up a weapon and the other is offered a weapon too, should he not take it even though he prefers the purity of hand to hand combat?

  2. A cute post, Stephen. I presume the humor is a sideways commentary on the report that ARI took PPP money.
    I think your first example works pretty well, since it posits something completely sensible that could have happened in Atlas (Thompson offering other people’s money to Taggart Transcontinental). But unfortunately, the joke would be deflated in Atlas, because it would not be Dagny or Eddie involved — Jim would have filled out the paperwork in a heartbeat!
    Your second example of Roark — that scene was his decision about artistic integrity and didn’t involve any particular “safety net” from the government, so the fantasy of him accepting some unemployment program doesn’t quite fit. I’m not sure this part of your material is ready for a stand-up gig yet…
    Your third example is unclear to me (as one Atlas insider), since no govt guy offered Rearden a blank check for his Metal, rather they insisted he sign a document *giving up* his rights to the Metal.

    On a related matter, can you work a joke out of the issue of the helicopter money that was sent out to virtually all Americans (I think 1200 bucks each)? Should one have rejected this? Maybe the joke would be the hapless attempt of Francisco to try to have this magical funds transfer reversed back to the Feds, since it just appeared in most people’s electronic bank accounts.

  3. Yes, they’re meant to work at a sense-of-life, fictional archetype level. If one can imagine Roark or Dagny or Rearden taking PPP, then the interesting question is why.

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