I am a member of an oppressed minority.
I have known this for a long time but recently came across irrefutable evidence of the calloused underbelly of our culture’s indifference to those who are different. Click on this image to see what I mean:
There it is, right in the middle of the page: Being left-handed is a defect like being lame, having ring worm or a wen.
That is from Pedro Carolino’s English as She Is Spoke, published in 1855. The book’s back cover states Pedro had a fine purpose: to create a Portuguese-to-English phrasebook for students and others. The only problem was that he didn’t know any English. He did, however, have a Portuguese-to-French dictionary and a French-to-English dictionary. Problem solved.
Samples of Pedro’s work:
Speaking of some delectable fruits: Esses damáscos ê pêcegos fázem-me vir água á bôca is translated as These apricots and these peaches make me and to come water in mouth.
In an angry mood: Moer-vos-hêi ôu moêl-ohêi ás pancádas means I should kill-you to the blows with a stick.
I want to be this guy: Elle requébra tôdas âs mulhéres comes out as He caresses all women.
Sínto rumor means I understand some noise. Indeed.
But not to be diverted from our serious theme: the Oppression of Left-handers by Society. I draw your attention to manual can openers, most scissors, and the computer mouse, all of which are designed with right-handers in mind.
According to an encyclopedia: “the English word sinister comes from the Latin word sinestra, which originally meant ‘left’ but took on meanings of ‘evil’ or ‘unlucky’ by the Classical Latin era.” That hurts. Sinistromanualism is a sin and a curse.
On the other hand, while only ten percent of the general population is left-handed — half of the last sixteen Presidents of the United States have been lefties (Reagan, Bush I, Clinton, and Obama among them). Evil or unlucky indeed.
[Revised from 2010.]